Do you ever feel like you watch life from the shadows, not sure whether it’s your time to step into the light? Worried that if you do it may burn you? This year has felt like such a phase. Indeed, after losing the light that was Sally in December it would be fair to say I retreated into a dark damp cellar, never mind the shadows. For having shadows implies that there is some form of light enabling them to be cast.
That’s the past: now the challenge is to step forward and tentatively lift my face to the sun both metaphorically and physically. I have written before that I became ill in June: it wasn’t pleasant but it wasn’t serious despite lasting longer than I would have perhaps liked. And if anyone ever tells me again that having an MRI scan is like lying back and listening to Pink Floyd they can go do unmentionable things to themselves. In the middle of the M1 motorway.
Good things: visiting my brother last month and resetting some mental buttons – small steps, as he says. Reorganising myself a little and getting a bit more focus. Husband underfoot remains underfoot, which is a good thing! Visiting the Doctor Who Experience with my niece. Screaming at a weeping angel sticking a claw in my head…
And little man Jack joined us last week. He’s a Jack Russell Terrier, about 18 months old, very small and an absolute poppet. Physically he is the complete opposite of Sally. He is utterly charming and a little git at the same time, but he is just settling in. Rehoming a dog was really difficult – the shelter (Newcastle Cat & Dog Shelter) are wonderful but there are so many dogs in need of homes that choosing just one is heartbreaking. We specifically wanted a smaller dog as we had the horrific realisation that as the dog gets older and may need more physical support that we will be approaching our 60s. So small dog only. Kind of broke my heart, as there was a beautiful male dog like the grandchild of Sally who is still looking for a home. He is just an absolute sweetheart and I hope someone takes him very soon.
So Jack is a darling and very much likes coastal living. He particularly likes cafe culture – Husband Underfoot has been on leave for 2 weeks so there has been a lot of eating and wine and pottering along the coast home. I’ve taken very few pictures of him as yet, something I must rectify. And getting a white dog was not a good idea for 2 people who only really wear black..
So. Onwards. I have a bit of, kind of, sort of a future plan. It’ll probably bomb but who knows?
Things: been reading Stephen King’s The Dark Tower series and the little oddity connected to it, The Eyes of the Dragon. Listening to Planet Rock and 80s rock chicks Heart, Pat Benetar and Stevie Nicks. Watching Stranger Things on Netflix, Preacher on Amazon and the wonderful Sing Street – anyone who loves sweet 1980’s nostalgia should watch this gorgeous film.